• Gf: babe come over
  • Me: I'm eating garlic bread
  • Gf: I'm horny and my parents aren't home
  • Me: it's the kind that's covered in cheese

leftyrosenthal:

e-gay:

the whispered “oh my god”… the look of of humiliation on the childs face… the brother is tired

lmfao I am both of them at the same time

(via crrocs)

skarvika:

masturb88ting:

does getting a septum piercing hurt?

it hurts the people that care about you

image

(via crrocs)

dweebscar:

vonniepanda:

cyanide123:

dweebscar:

dweebscar:

what if giraffes lived underwater

image

what a majestic creature

It would explain nesie

Pewdie will love this pic 

i wont have that name said in this household. take that language outside

(via crrocs)

after i fainted

  • nurse: how many fingers?
  • me: 3 with some lube